Have you ever been afraid of the future? I’m right there with you. I’m at a jumping off point and fear my mental health will get in the way. Bipolar-me doesn’t like to be stable so I have to really grasp hard to complete my longer-term goals. At this point, my goals include building a business by incorporating a product line focused on positive thinking and building upon talents. I also have a goal to write a book, be more consistent with my blog posts, and go back to school for a Master of Fine Art in Creative Writing. I’m terrified I’m going to feel overwhelmed and shut down – especially at an integral moment. I’m terrified I will change my mind halfway through and end up back at ground zero.

The good thing is, I have medication that will help regulate me. I have my family and friends who encourages me. I know I have the intellect to do it. It all comes down to mental health.

I’m tired of mental health ruling my life, but my mental health is just that – mine whether I want it or not. The question is how I can use my mental health to my advantage. OCD-me loves picking weeds because it’s detail-oriented and there is something about clearing weeds that satisfy an obsession for a better-looking yard. That is using my mental health to my advantage. (FYI-Bipolar-me likes to fight with OCD-me, so please don’t think I have the perfect yard.)

So how can I use the often reigning Bipolar-me to my advantage with future goals/tasks/obligations/conquests? There’s a thought. Perhaps my goals need to become quests. What’s the fun in life if you can’t have a few epic quests? Here’s the big problem: Bipolar Depressive-me. How can I combat that troll? (I like dragons too much to turn them into the bad guys.)

While nothing will completely vanquish that troll, I can keep it more at bay with self-care and understanding my mental health cycles. The troll will appear and take over, but I can exercise self-care to combat it like a sword of light. (I like swords, too. Have I shown you my sword wall? – And there we see a glimpse of Bipolar Manic-Me.)

Self-care for me means showering, brushing my teeth, reading for fun, and crafting. I cross stitch and have recently discovered diamond painting. A few to 30 minutes of self-care often helps me focus more on my current quest. (Oh, how I love metaphors.)

So there we have a partial and imperfect solution to a problem that will never go away, but it’s a start. I still fear the future and worry about my future endeavors, but I have a plan to work thorough that fear. We’ll see how well it works and adjust as necessary. That’s all anyone can do when faced with a troll.