Let's Walk This Journey Together

Tag: social media

A Note from Gribble: It’s About to Get More Personal

Gribble here. My girl is embarking on a more personal journey, so I’ve added a new category in our posts! The category is “It’s Getting Personal”. I’m going to tell you the events of what she calls her “three years of hell” so you have a better understanding of the obstacles she navigated and still faces. Sympathy is not necessary or sought.

My girl’s life changed forever in 2016. The year began with a miscarriage and she lost her job due to the deep depression she experienced. Six months later, as she was just coming out of her funk, she unexpectedly lost her husband to a thrombotic embolism (a blood clot), leaving her to raise their three children (almost 12, 10, and 3) by herself.

Her uncle died one month later while she was trying to pack her house to move out of state. About a month and a half of homelessness followed while she moved her children and the cranky 10-year-old cat from one relative’s house to another. When she was finally able to procure permanent housing with her parents, she crashed down from survivor mode.

A very serious bout of clinical depression overtook her life when she exited survivor mode. Some family members discussed the need to have her admitted. They eventually decided that my girl’s children needed her presence more since their father was no longer there. I don’t know if that was what was best for the children, but that was the decision made.

Eight months after her uncle’s death, her husband’s grandmother died. A more specific diagnosis of Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) was added to her pre-existing conditions of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), intrusive thoughts, Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), and anxiety when she was able to emotionally get herself out of bed and to therapy.

Several months before the grandmother died and for two months following, my girl took care of her bedbound mother until her passing at the end of May 2017. Her mother was buried one week before her husband’s one-year anniversary.

Nine months later her cousin’s 21-year-old son died in a tragic car accident, two weeks later her daughter’s dog died, and about four months later her daughter’s 11-month-old kitten died. Her then 4-year-old was diagnosed with autism and therapy led to the discovery of my girl having Bi-Polar Disorder (BPD). She told me later that many things in her life, even prior to her husband’s death, made significantly more sense.

While she was not close to all of those who passed away, the fact that death loomed so close to home struck a nerve with each notification of loss and each step of her mental health journey.

Navigating life is tough. Please remember that this post is not meant to dredge up sympathy. It is simply meant to be informational. Her journey is changing, as is expected in life, and I feel it would be best for her to share that journey with all of you. Perhaps the growth and setbacks as she works through her grief, mental health, and spiritual travels will help someone else someday. I hope you find comfort or enlightenment in the posts.

If you choose to comment on a post, PLEASE BE KIND. Everyone deserves kindness in one aspect or another. Be that person who is kind, positive, and factual in your comments.

Now I need to get back to my place of safety before my girl’s puppy finds me. Happy reading!

You Are Worth It!

Do any of you remember Orkut? It was social media platform that launched in 2004 and shut down only a decade later, so I won’t hold it against you if you don’t remember it. In fact, the most popular population to use it were Brazilians. (p. 192)

Orkut’s ultimate demise came from issues revolving around its functionality. (p. 193) Problems such as friend limits and photo sharing quality inhibited the user experience. The platform simply wasn’t flexible enough to meet consumer needs. Was the issue the software itself? Was the issue because the developers chose not to update those features for some reason? Or was it because they didn’t know it was an issue until it was too late?

Orkut’s problem relates very much to our lives. How flexible are we? Do we have software (mental health) issues that are difficult to fix, that is if they can be fixed at all? Are we not open enough to take other points of view into consideration? Do we even realize we have a problem? Perhaps we realize but are too embarrassed to address it or think it’s too late to change.

These are the things I want to address. I could easily go into the current political and economic situation with this line of thinking, but I would rather not go down that rabbit hole. Instead, let’s look at the micro-level and concentrate on the individual – ourselves.

I have talked about mental health before, and it’s no secret I am a strong proponent for the issue. I deal with the effects of it on a regular basis, whether it is me, my children, my extended family, or friends and acquaintances. Our software – our brain’s mental health – only has a certain amount of ability to extend beyond its current programing. You can’t expect a person with Downs Syndrome to become a nuclear physicist. It is simply beyond their capacity. However, that is not necessarily the case with many circumstances. I have known those who use their mental health as a vehicle to gain things or as an excuse for why they can’t be expected to be held to a higher level of control.

Someone prone to depression and anxiety has the ability to rise above it, but it takes a lot of hard work, sometimes medication, counseling, and will power. That said, the pendulum always swings from amazing to down periods for which interventions are necessary. There are always exceptions, but the majority of those who experience it have a higher capacity then they realize. That majority includes me. It takes daily maintenance.

Down periods require a great deal of flexibility. We need to be able to recognize the signs and listen to our needs. Orcut lacked longevity due to a lack of flexibility. We have the potential for a great deal of flexibility within our own limits.

I remember the period after my husband passed away, I really needed someone to advocate for me to help me get the help I needed. I should have been on disability. I should have been in therapy immediately. I couldn’t do it myself – I simply didn’t have it in me to get any of it done. My husband had been my advocate, and he was gone. There was no way I could have anticipated his loss and set up a new advocate. Having a team is necessary.

The moral of the story? Be gentle with yourself. Listen to yourself and your needs. Create and follow through with intervention plans. Build a team who can help you monitor your needs. Advocate for yourself whenever possible. You are worth it.

Censorship in Media – Real or Made up?

Warning: Touchy Topic

Weixin (pronounced “way-shin”) is another case study I reviewed in my graduate courses. For those who have never heard of Weixin (like me), they are a social media platform in China that has taken over. The idea behind the creators of Weixin’s platform was to be a “one-stop shopping” experience. It was all about bringing the traditionally social part of social media together with the functionality of other platforms to create a place users could do everything they need within one interface.

In three years from its inception, Weixin grew to more than 300 million users. When I first read this statistic I thought, “How in the world did they do that?” I’m not the only one to ponder that same question. The case study stated they “are more than a combination of Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat, and eBay.” The study was right. They forgot Uber. Weixin contracted with 350,000 taxi drivers in 30+ cities in China to allow their users to book and pay for the taxi ride through their interface.

The idea of having a platform with that kind of multi-functioning power makes me wonder why there isn’t such an interface here in America. The case study stated that some of those 300 million users were in America, which led me to a platform called “WeChat”. The parent company of Weixin, Tencent, created WeChat as an overseas alterative to Weixin.

At first glance, it doesn’t seem like a big deal for Tencent to have two different applications until you look at other platforms. Facebook doesn’t have two platforms, one domestic and the other for overseas use. Sure, there are different interfaces due to language differences. What works for English speakers does not work the same for those with right-to-left reading languages like Arabic, however, they use different interfaces not completely different applications. What is the difference?

The more I look into the question, the more I realize the answer is censorship. How could a platform created to be an all-in-one solution with an easy-to-use user interface create censorship? The answer lies in algorithms.

Tencent created Weixin for China, not for the rest of the world. According to an article featured on Chozan [https://chozan.co/wechat-vs-weixin/], marketers seeking to target mainland China must register for a specific account through Weixin. Those wishing to target anywhere else in the world must register for an account through WeChat. Why the difference? What makes China so different from the rest of the world? Again, the answer lies in the algorithms.

The algorithms for mainland China require different filtering that sorts through the information and only displays what the algorithms are designed to allow. That can be a wonderful thing in some cases. Take pornography for example. Facebook has very strict algorithms that does not allow pornography on the platform. YouTube, on the other hand, allows pornography as long as it is blocked as adult only content. The algorithms are clearly different.

The same thing applies to Weixin and WeChat. Some messages are allowed in the rest of the world, but not in China. Why? Who is holding the reins on the information allowed?

Perhaps I’m right. Perhaps I’m wrong. The question is up to you do decide because no matter how much I tell you about such a sensitive subject, you will never truly know until you research it yourself. Discover for yourself if what I’m saying is true. Then look at the information you are presented here in America. Is the information you are presented actually true just because it was reported on the news, or does different stations present different conclusions on the same events? Something to think about.